Pour Out Your Heart

Psalm 62:8 says, "Trust in Him at all times, O people; pour out your hearts to Him, for God is our refuge."

I love that verse and while I really get that with my head and even try to practice it, God made it so real to my heart tonight...

It was a crazy evening of storms... Tornadoes were touching down within miles of us, hail, green skies...it was crazy! As the evening wore on, there was one last cell that came through that was really scary...

We had our plan, we knew who was going to which closet and bathroom, pillows and blankets were ready and waiting, we were just all sitting in the family room together waiting in case Scott told us to move quickly...

As we waited, Abby came and crawled up in the chair with me... It's a big chair so she wasn't sitting right up next to me, so I put my arm on the back of the chair, kind of opening myself up to her, but not forcing my comfort on her... I just wanted her to know I was available if she decided she needed me.

As the storm rolled in, the winds picked up, the hail came down and the news channels began to warn of the perfect tornado conditions, Abby finally looked up at me and said very hesitantly, "Mommy, I'm scared."

That was all the invitation I needed, I pulled her in close and whispered that everything would be ok... I couldn't stop the storm, but I would do everything in my power to protect her...

Thankfully, the storm passed without a tornado but those few minutes gave me so much to think about...

I have longed for Abby to trust me... I know she's tested me over the last 18 months and I think she has found me trustworthy... First I earned her trust by providing for her most basic needs...then she allowed me to care for her skinned knees and elbows...next she trusted me with her stories of China...but tonight, she trusted me with her fears...perhaps the things that make us the most vulnerable...

My heart could have just danced when she looked up at me and said, "Mommy, I'm scared." And yet, that's the very thing our heavenly Father wants from us... He longs for us to find refuge in the shelter of His wings...for us to be vulnerable with Him and trust Him with our greatest fears (and everything else)!!

He will never force His comfort on us, yet He is always waiting, if we will just trust Him... What a blessing and privilege to call Him Abba Father!