Saturday, May 21, 2011

Some Days Are Just Hard....

I haven't written in a while, my jewelry business has become kind of consuming, but today was one of those hard days and I can't get away from the sense that I'm supposed to blog about it...

It was a day we had looked forward to for a couple of weeks...  Zack's soccer team had made it to the State Cup semi-finals and this was their morning.  We had to leave early to get to the game and Abby wanted to get up early and go with us...

I'm still not sure what happened, but the time came to leave and I found her in her room with her door locked...  She opened it when I knocked, but she wasn't dressed...  Deep breath (I hate to be late to anything)...  She claimed nothing was wrong, but her eyes told a different story...  I told her to go ahead and get dressed...  Of course my temptation was to be short and rush her, but that gentle whisper in my heart told me to sit down...

When she came out of the bathroom, she sat down next to me and just had a good cry...  it happens sometime, usually at the most inopportune times.  I admit, today's timing was a struggle...  It was Zack's big day and I knew being late would stress him out...  But hmmm...  late to a soccer game...  loving our precious daughter like our Heavenly Father loves us...  In the end (thankfully) God's way won out and we were 20 minutes late to the game (warm-ups...not the game itself)...

I don't know what was going on...  Lately it seems like she's struggling with a sense of belonging, imagine that, after all she's lived through...  But I have to wonder if it's something she'll always struggle with...  I hope not, but it's something that only God Himself can heal.

I was really proud of Zack and the way he handled the day...  We were late...  he lost his starting position because of it...  And not once did he complain...  I love watching the adults our children are becoming by God's grace...

Well, the thunderstorm has passed and her giggles are brighter and clearer (and more contagious) than ever...  It makes me so sad that she has to hurt like that, but so thankful that God has blessed us with the privilege of being the ones to hug her in her hurt...  She's really an amazing child!

2 comments:

Anonymous said...

Really makes me sad for Abby, and Zack too. But it also makes me proud of Zack and his reaction to the situation. Also proud of the way you handled sweet Abby. I call that loving patience. Loving patience is what I get everyday from my Heavenly Father so I recognize it!!! Love you

sierrasmom said...

I learn so much from you!! I am so impessed at the way Zack handled it. It is so hard to know what really goes on in our girls minds. And it is becasue of all they went through that they sometimes don't want to believe that they really belong somewhere now...and its forever!
Hugs
Kathie