In just a few hours my mother and I step onto an airplane and fly to Africa! I am so excited...
Our topic in Sunday School, yesterday, was the leading of the Holy Spirit. And as we looked at Acts 19-21, where Paul feels compelled to go back to Jerusalem, in spite of the dangers that lay ahead, it occurred to me that what God calls us to do is not always logical and wise, by the world's standards...
And I thought about this trip to Africa and how that certainly characterizes this trip... We have 4 children... 1 adopted child only home for a year... My husband's division has just landed a HUGE contract... Could we say a recipe for stress?
And yet, we both have such utter peace that this is what I'm supposed to do... The 'we' is so important, because I think I've said this before, I firmly believe that God will NEVER lead a husband and wife in two different directions... He is a God of unity!
And as I thought about my peace, I thought about how God used a sweet bloggy friend of mine to confirm this trip for me in such a BIG way... If you missed that post, you can read about it here... God is So Cool
Thank you dear friend, your act of obedience is my remembering stone that God used to give me TOTAL certainty that I am supposed to be on this trip!
So today we leave... Right now I am somewhere else in the south at my mom's so we can fly out together. Just a little while ago, I had the incredible blessing of meeting Ian, who is the President of Heart For Africa (I met his wife when she led our first trip, they are one amazing couple!)...
But as mom and I talked to Ian and listened to his God stories, it occurred to me once again, that one of the things that I LOVE about Africa is that you see God in such a BIG way... He shows up in the most unbelievable details... His fingerprints are EVERYWHERE!! And as I thought about this, it occurred to me that going to Africa is like going behind the veil... It offers a glimpse of heaven and the amazing power of God that I just miss in the land of plenty... America.
It's funny how we talk so much about the blessing of living in the US, but sometimes I have to question, "is it really?" When my focus is on abundance...freedom...safety...then yes, living in America is an incredible blessing. But when my focus is on a passion to see God, then all of the stuff of America can be pretty distracting...
Ian said something that I will write in my Bible and NEVER forget... He said that he "lives in a constant state of awe of God." Is that the coolest thing? "A constant state of awe of God..." THAT is what I want for my life! Is it possible in the US? Absolutely... Is it harder? Yes...because of all of the stuff... Very few of us experience being utterly dependent on God's provision...or being desperate for His power in our lives, we are just far too self sufficient.
So as I head to Africa, I go with a heart that can't wait to see Him... I pray that this time God will capture my heart in a way that even when I come back to the land of distraction, my experience of Him will be so BIG that I will guard my heart at all costs from being pulled away from Him, by anything!
As one of my favorite hymns says, "Let thy goodness, like a fetter, bind my wandering heart to thee... Prone to wander Lord I feel, prone to leave the God I love, here's my heart on take and seal it, seal it for thy courts above..."
May God, once and for all, bind my wandering heart to Him.
I probably won't be able to blog for the next 2 weeks... But I will journal the whole time and share that with you when I come back (and lots of photos!) If God should bring us to mind, would you pray for our safety, that we would simply be empty vessels that God will use however He likes and for Scott and the kids...for peace, for safety, for order... And that Abby would know in the depths of her heart that mommy is coming home!
On that note, I'll leave you with 2 Abby stories... Yesterday she brought something to me that she had made...but I'm not allowed to open it until I get to Africa, I will honor that, but I can't wait to see what it is... She had Scott write it for her, but he said the words are all hers... That's all I know.
And as I was leaving yesterday, Abby said, "Just one.... mommy!" My heart sank because I didn't understand her and I thought she was telling me, just one hug. But I asked her what she said and she said, "Just one kiss mommy." Abby NEVER lets me kiss her! That so touched my heart! And then I asked her for a big hug and she put both of her arms around me and really hugged!
Pray that God will use this time to show her that this is for real... she can trust me... that I ALWAYS come back!
Have a blessed 2 weeks... I can't wait to share what God shows us when we get to go a little closer to heaven!
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